Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Bailey's Birth Story

(*Note - No, you have not traveled back in time, I fully realize that this post is over two years late, and yes, I am working on a two year post for Bailey because she totally deserves a fabulous one!  But I have to write this down or else I know I'll forget it, and I don't want to forget the night my most favorite girl in the world decided she wanted to join us.....)

On September 30, 2010 (two days before I was due on October 2), Scott and I went out to dinner with a friend of mine who'd clerked in the Western District with me.  I ate a delicious bbq chicken pizza, and I'm pretty sure that despite my huge belly I found the room in my stomach to just about finish it off.  We went home afterwards and went to bed as usual.  I woke up around 2 am or so that night to go to the bathroom (as is annoyingly normal during pregnancy) but when I stood up, I felt a gush of fluid.  It wasn't huge, just kind of felt like I'd peed my pants a medium-sized amount (sorry if that's tmi, but after everything that happened later, this is nothing, so if that bothers you you should prob stop reading now). 

I woke Scott up to tell him I thought my water may have broken, and he more or less replied that I was crazy, there was no way that was what that was and we'd know for sure if it had.  So I got back in bed and tried to go back to sleep.  Of course, I couldn't sleep and when I stood up again, the same thing happened again.  So I walked around the house a few times trying to figure out what was going on and while there were a few more small gushes, there was nothing to clearly indicate anything was going on.  I then laid back down and, after awhile, I felt what I was sure was my first contraction (I'd had a few episodes of feeling extreme tightness in my belly, which I guess may have been braxton hicks, but nothing like this).  I got up a little while later and went to the bathroom and saw some spotting, which our doctor had just told us at the appointment that week was a pretty good sign "things were really happening."  So, at that point I told Scott I was pretty sure this was the real deal.  To which he replied, and no I'm not joking, "then I have a project at work for Bob that I really need to go downtown to finish up first."  I wasn't exactly thrilled at the thought, and really thought that was a pretty weird response at that moment, but I was still feeling pretty good so I told him to go if he had to, but to hurry.  So I laid in bed holding Reilly for the next couple of hours while timing contractions with handy little app on my phone.  (Reading this now with the benefit of hindsight, I can't believe I didn't call the doctor immediately after the first gush.  I mean, losing amniotic fluid is no joke!  No idea where my brain was.  Also in hindsight, after all the stories I've read about how fast labor can go for some people, I can't say I think that having Scott leave me alone while I was in labor was the best idea and I don't necessarily think I'd be ok with doing it again, but at the time I was totally comfortable with it for some reason.  So, I'm glad it everything turned out ok!)

At about 5:30 am or so, I finally called Scott and told him I was taking a shower and putting on makeup because it was time to go.  The contractions were still manageable, but they were now about 3 minutes apart and getting closer together and I did not want to push it too far.  So he came home and we headed to the hospital. 

Once we got to the hospital waiting room around 6:30 or 7 a.m., I was still having frequent contractions but they were still manageable.  I remember there was a very young and very pregnant girl with her parents in the waiting room in a wheelchair who seemed to be having pains much worse than me, so I felt a little silly being there.  When we got to the room, they checked me and I was still only 1.5 cm dilated, exactly what I had been at my last doctor's appointment, so I thought I might get sent home.  Apparently they saw enough regular contractions to make me stay though, so we settled in and they started the pitocin.  Strangely, we learned later that the young girl who had been with her parents and made me seem so not in labor had actually not been in labor and had been sent home (not sure why or how we learned that).  I still wonder what happened to her and what her story was.

The doctor at the hospital, who was not my doctor but someone in her practice that I had never met before, explained to me the "continuum of dilation" or something like that, and mentioned that she had a couple of students with her on the shift and I agreed that they could observe me and that I would answer questions for them.  I can't exactly remember what they asked, but it was mostly about whether we had any other kids, my pain level, etc. 

Since the contractions were still manageable, I didn't get an epidural right away and rather chose to try to go as far on my own as I could.  However, I did not do very well on the "continuum of dilation," and after a number of hours I was still around a 2.  So I agreed to get the epidural, which was not fun  (apparently I have a "narrow space" and the anesthesiologist had such a hard time that after a few pokes at me, she had to call in someone else to do it) but totally worth it afterwards. 

After the epidural, I could finally relax and sleep a little bit through the contractions, which was nice as I'd been up since 2 a.m.  Unfortunately, I still didn't dilate.  The doctor came in a little before 5 p.m to check me, and I had still not dilated to a 4 - I think I was 2.5 or 3.  The sweet students who had been so enthusiastic about getting to see the full process were long gone.  At that point, the doctor let me know that based on her "continuum," I had less than a ten percent chance of delivering vaginally, but let me know that as long as I was not in distress and the baby was not in distress, we could keep trying.  Of course, I opted to keep trying. 

I'm pretty sure that about 30 seconds after the doctor said that and left the room, she came marching right back in and let me know that I no longer really had a choice - Bailey was in distress.  That was one of the scariest and saddest moments of my life, and I will never forget it.  But I was not about to risk my child's well-being for trying to have a birth experience for myself, and immediately agreed to a c-section. 

Things went pretty fast after that.  They upped my epidural significantly, and I think they gave me some kind of green oral medication too, because I vividly remember throwing up green stuff everywhere as they wheeled me down the hall to surgery.  We got to the OR and Scott wasn't there, and I was terrified he was going to miss it, but thankfully he showed up before things really got going. 

I remember everyone in the OR seeming to be in a good mood and laughing and joking together.  At first that seemed weird to me because I was completely terrified, but it also kind of comforted me to see people acting like this was all just normal and a pleasant experience, and it makes me happy to remember Bailey coming in the world to such a relaxed atmosphere.  I remember feeling the pushing on my belly and looking at Scott and saying "don't you want to see this?"  He was then confused, because we had previously agreed that he would stay AT MY HEAD during the birth - I didn't want anyone who was not getting paid to see what happened "down there."  I guess he didn't realize that rule didn't apply to a c-section, and only just peeked over the curtain to see the doctor pull Bailey out of my belly. 

I remember them telling me that she had been a little off in her positioning, and that may have been part of why she couldn't get out.  Instead of the conehead most babies get from the birth canal, she had a large lump on the side of her head (which would remain for several weeks).

Scott got to see and hold her first while they sewed me back up, which made me a little sad, but they finally laid her on my chest and I was in love and completely and utterly terrified of this sweet baby that I had thought I would recognize immediately.  All I wanted to do was hold her and love on her, but I also felt like - wow, I have NEVER seen this baby's face before, and I have NO idea what she's thinking, but she is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.

After the c-section, they took her away to clean her for awhile and I shook like the dickens for what felt like forever (I know that probably is a really weird thing to put in a birth story, but I had never heard of the shaking before, and it completely freaked me out.  Why does no one talk about the shaking?!?!)    

But then they finally brought her back to us, and we were thrilled to be a happy little family of three :).